I have the concept of a plan…

The manic state ebbed, as anticipated, however, the day dreaming did not. I dream of traveling across America in my van with my dog, of making a web series were I speak to people of all backgrounds and cultures. I want to show the world that we have so much more in common than not. That we are all motivated by fear and a desire to be loved. That we all want to be seen, heard and considered and that’s all…

As it was with my previous ventures, I’m paralyzed by fear. I’m terrorized at the idea that I’m having delusions of grandeur about my skillset, charisma and ability to persevere, but also… I feel like a waste of potential. I feel like I’m selling myself short, keeping myself trapped in smallness and for what? Humility? I’m not asking for so much, I just want to be everything that I can be, that’s all!

How do we break through the barriers of our own mind? “I am the observer. I am the consciousness that observes the fear within me. I am not the fear.” She says, trembling with dread. The worst is, when I think about what I would need to move forward… I’ve actually had it. I organized a little protest years ago and it ended up in the news and I got interviewed left right and center. People liked the way I spoke. It was the confirmation I needed… and I let it slipped, and now, I don’t know how to self actualize in this climate. I don’t know how to merge all of my communication styles. Comedy? Written word? Philosophy? How do I make it all become one… I don’t want to be an influencer. I just want to speak to people and let them be heard. I want to build bridges where most people burn them.

Thank you for being my starting point. ❤